The Tale of Elliptical Hill

My husband and I are both fairly educated people, but if you lived near us you would be writing letters to our various alma maters requesting that our degrees be rescinded in order to maintain academic quality and reputation. At least four times a calendar year our neighbors witness us doing something that     …

Pumping Iron: A Cautionary Tale

One night at my parents’ house. That’s all it took. I was doing just fine and then BAM, all of a sudden I’m ironing again. It’s been several years since I’ve spoken to my iron. So long in fact that when I just tried to type “iron” I started typing “oven” because my fingers don’t…

What the French Call Les Incompetents

Home Alone is one of the greatest cinematic achievements of our time. (Not up for debate.) So when Glen and I overslept last Friday, the morning I was supposed to take him and the kids to the airport, it was kind of fun at first. “We slept in!” Dun dunnana dun dun dun da. Dun dunnana…