Whoop Hair It Is

I have a running list of things I wish I was good at. Singing, long division, reading the directions, having any desire to read the directions… Doing my own hair is also very high up on the list. I currently have three styles – blown dry, slept in a wet braid, and “Mommy your ponytail messy.” Thanks, Jack.

I didn’t say he was wrong, just a tad judgey considering he is at least 25% of the reason I look like this.

There are lots of reasons why this is one of my sought after skills. Not the least of which is my list of potential hair salon names for when I got so good at doing my own hair that other people would pay me to do their hair.

Whoop Hair It Is

Tortoise and the Hair

Neither Hair Nor There

A Dark Alley

Although I could use that last one now. “Geesh, where did you get your hair cut? A dark alley?” “Yes.”

On the drive to my parents’ house there is a hair salon with a dynamite name that makes Glen and I laugh every time we drive by. Curl Up and Dye. I love those people oh so very much.

The other reasons why I would enjoy this skill include but are not limited to: vanity, jealousy, the wish that my hair could look good for multiple days in a row without washing it, the desire to fit in at bachelorette parties, the fact that Glen almost divorces me twice a year because there is so much hair all over our house, and fiscal responsibility.

Yet I’m always thwarted by the reason that thwarts many other good intentions. Laziness. As I write this my hair is wet and I know darn well that if I don’t blow dry it soon it will be in a “Oh, honey, did the kids not sleep well for you last night?” state for the next two days and I won’t be able to fix it. But here I sit, typing away as Glen does yard work in the dark of night while I’m inside “watching the baby monitor.” Is it too late to change the name of this blog to An Ongoing Apology to My Husband?

While we are in this deep, meaningful conversation about hair can another mother out there tell me when I can expect postpartum hair loss to stop? Before or after Norah’s high school graduation? A ballpark is fine. It’s gotten so bad that I got genuinely excited to see anti shedding shampoo in my sister-in-law’s bathroom until I realized it was for their dogs, and then I honestly almost used it anyway. I’ve come across a couple articles about dealing with postpartum hair loss and the suggestion on one of them was “stay stress free” and there was a picture of a woman dancing in a field… That joke just made itself…

pretty-woman-in-field.jpg

I feel slightly better about my hair being a hot mess disaster right now because I’m growing it back out to donate again. I had #longhairdontcare for my whole life. Except for the time I cut my own hair when I was three in an effort to be helpful. But after my miscarriages I really felt like I needed to get out of my own head and do something for someone else. So I cut my hair way off and donated it through the Pantene Beautiful Lengths program. Considering donating your hair? Check it out. My plan is to donate through them again since Locks for Love seems to be more well known. Both are wonderful though.

Donate Your Hair

If you don’t take a picture of yourself holding your ponytail did you even really donate your hair?

As usual this turned into a “stream of consciousness email to my best friend” style post. So thanks for reading, #bff. I hope you’re having a killer hair day. Call me.

With 99 problems and my hair is 7,

Becca

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12 thoughts on “Whoop Hair It Is

  1. A great read, as always. Smiling all the way through it. 🙂 I’m also in the “I wish I could do something, anything! with my hair” club. Thanks for letting me know I’m not alone. And I still shed like crazy. And I have 2 girls that are 8 and 10. We actually have tumbleweeds of hair blow through our house on occasion. Drives my husband crazy.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I have taken to braiding as much as possible of it and then throwing the rest in a messy bun. Because if part of it is intentional, the rest can look like a hair explosion, right? It’s about balance. Also, I know some nutritional stuff that helps with postpartum hair loss, if you’re interested! ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Ha! When I saw that list of names, I was going to mention that there was once a Curl Up and Dye in my town. 😀 (I knew the owner, and her mom was NOT pleased with the name at all.)

    I suck at hair, too. Doing my hair, makeup, and pretty much doing anything to make myself look like less of a bum just aren’t priorities for me. I could claim that I skimp on that stuff to spend more time with my kids, but it’s definitely just laziness. But at least looking like a bum, people’s expectations of me aren’t high. Winning.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thanks, lady! That’s the look from the last time I chopped it, hoping to replicate it when my hair gets to the right length again. But man, short hair takes a lot of work so I think growing it out a little more isn’t that bad of an idea… 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Pingback: Party Like a Rock(y Mountain) Star | With love and a little self-deprecation

  5. Right now I’m sitting with a towel wrapped around my wet-but-halfway-dry-and-halfway-to-frizzy-waves hair, reading blogs at midnight when I should be drying my hair and getting my tired butt to bed. An Ongoing Apology To My Husband, lol!!!
    I would totally get my haircut in A Dark Alley. A+ for creativity!!! (10pts if you get the book reference…)

    Liked by 2 people

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