My great great grandfather has a patent on the excavating bucket, so as a kid it was always terribly confusing to me why his picture wasn’t on our currency. America – he invented something!! Show some respect.
I have made a couple people in my day but I checked and you can’t patent people so I’ve really never invented anything. It must feel awesome to invent something. Imagine walking around saying “You know that thing that you rely on every day? No big deal but that didn’t exist until my brain made it up.”
I must say though I have gotten pretty close to inventing things – just several years too late. For example, in college I was sitting on my dorm bed and said to a friend “You know what would be amazing? If there was a thing you could just pick up and it would connect you to another person so you could ask if they wanted to go get dinner.” Brilliant really. Alexander Graham Bell thought so too. Shorts were also my brain child in the early 2000’s. “Ugh, I hate when jean skirts twist around when you walk. They should really have like two separate holes for your legs so that won’t happen.”
Recently some newer inventions have come into my world and they are so wonderful that I wish I hadn’t been so busy inventing the telephone so I could have come up with these first. You didn’t think summer could get any better? Check out these summer hacks and enjoy the last few weeks of the most glorious season of the year. (Calm down, fall.)
Note: These are affiliate links so I make like .03 cents I think if you buy one of these items. #collegesavings. But that doesn’t change the fact that I adore them with all my being, thought they would be fun to write about, and honestly just want you to know they exist.
Have you ever tried to convince a toddler that it is too early to get up at 4:45am when the sun has also mistakenly decided that a new day has begun? If not, imagine trying to negotiate with a tornado. Or trying to convince a cow to wear pants. But this little magical piece of electric plastic has somehow managed to keep my two year old peaceful and quiet in his crib until 6:15am
every most days even with the summer sun a shining. He waits patiently until his clock turns green before calling out “Mommy! I’m awake!” Yet again, I’m left wondering how parents raised children before the technological revolution.
So you’re supposed to drink 8 glasses of water a day right? Because it’s good for your skin, and health, and Michelle Obama probably does it. Especially important for the summer. But basically by definition water isn’t really anything and given the choice between a tall glass of water and tall glass of Pinot Grigio I’m going to lean heavily towards the thing that tastes delicious. But it’s “inappropriate to drink wine during the day” so I asked for one of these fruit infusing bad boys for my birthday and I love it. Toss a couple strawberries in the middle section, add water, and it’s like you’re at the spa during your 10am staff meeting. Done and done.
This post is a taking a serious and unintentional day drinking turn. But meh, it’s summer. BottleKeeper looks like a water bottle, but you can hide a beer bottle in it. So really the whole point of this little gem is to be able to drink a beer at the beach without making the teenagers patrolling the beach feel uncomfortable while they pretend they don’t see you in order to avoid confrontation. Keeps the beer cold too. Genius.
If you’re a parent of a small person and haven’t been covered in bubble soap at some point, wait about 6 more minutes because it’s coming soon. I promise. Bubbles are delightful, but as soon as your kiddo hits the “I do it myself” stage that bubble soap is going eve.ry.where. Enter the most brilliant invention I’ve ever heard of and that includes sliced bread. (Why is that a saying? Push comes to shove I’ll cut my own bread, nbd.) Tip Fubbles upside down. Throw them in your beach bag. Give them to a toddler begging for bubbles who will play with them for a few minutes before seeing a cool bug and dropping the bubbles and running away. They still won’t spill. It’s witchcraft, and I’m on board.
Any other awesome inventions that take summer up a notch for you? Or anything that you’ve “invented” a few years too late? Did your brother also stare at you with disdain in family photos?
With a brilliant mind and unfortunate timing,